So, this post will be quite a bit shorter than my usual reflection.
First of all, my apologies for being offline for the last while. The last few weeks my great-grandmother (whom I wrote about in my last post 103 Years of Wisdom: Grandma’s Top 10 Tips for Vitality) was in the hospital, and sadly passed away July 1st. Obviously, I’ve taken some time off to heal with my family, and this event has allowed for a lot of deep thinking…I’ll share just one of those thoughts with you now.
My family lives quite far away from where my grandmother does, the drive is about 7hours long. We found out when she was sent to the hospital that for various reasons it was impossible for other family members who lived in the same city as her to stay with her 24/7. Without hesitation, we made the decision to drive down and be with her for the weekend. Not only did we do this because we love her, it’s the right thing to do, who wouldn’t? But also for that ever so common reason: you will regret it if you don’t.
We stayed with her all weekend, and we got to say the final goodbye that a lot of people wish they had. You would think we could leave there without any regrets.
But that’s not the case.
Because my mom regrets that she couldn’t stay with her longer, she had to get back home for work. She regrets that she was so upset to see her that way, that she couldn’t say all the things she wanted to.
We didn’t leave that hospital “regretless”, we just left with different regrets than we would have had, had we not gone to see her.
And this is the conclusion I have come to: as much as we all endeavour to live our lives a certain way it is impossible to live a life with no regrets.
We all have regrets. I’m sure even my great-grandmother, the person I look up to the most, has regrets about decisions or things that happened in her life.
We put so much pressure on ourselves to have lived a life were proud of, and we think that means to have lived a life without faults. But we are all going to make tons of mistakes, its really just a question of which ones.
The bottom line is this: it’s not possible to live without regrets, because we are creatures of reflection, and we will always think up something we wish we had done better.
So if you’re out there, beating yourself up in your head, thinking that other people are walking around with some mystical blank conscience, and that your life is somehow worth less because you’re not…please PLEASE know that perfection is a myth, and the only person holding anything against you is…you. So let’s just not do that anymore, okay? We’re always going to have regrets…let’s just stop feeling guilty about them. It’s the least we can do for ourselves.
Here’s hoping that you enjoy every blessing and every mistake,
Love, the chipped tea cup in the display cabinet